Today I meditated.
The sun was sparkling above me.
The breeze slightly warmer than usual caressing my skin.
I closed my eyes and fell into that beautiful space of mindful clarity.
I quietly started humming ‘Ommmm’ as my legs crossed and finger tips touched each other in that sacred pose you see all the deities striking.
In the zone, nothing disturbed my nothingness.
I was there… deep and deeper than ever before.
The comforting sensation of peace, calm and ease flooded me instantly.
Purely focused on my breath, I noticed every single movement associated with inhalation and exhalation.
My mind remained clear for the whole 60 minutes until a soft chime rang, guiding me to open my eyes.
I smiled warmly and pat myself on the back for another successful meditative practice.
I nailed it. Like I do every single time. Every day. Twice a day.
Seriously? Is this how I meditate?
Not even close.
The only truth in that whole shmangle of words are the first three lines.
Yes, I did meditate today.
And yes, the sun and the breeze were warm.
The rest of the story? Didn’t quite happen like that:
I was out on the deck, cruising through facebook or instagram and got bored with it.
My dog was chomping on a stick beside me.
I was wearing my cameo long johns, socks pulled up a little too high and adorning the same tank top for the 3rd day in a row. This is me. At home. On a day off.
Even on a free day, I admit, I rarely carve out time for a ‘proper meditation’.
For me, mediation is simply a choice to bring my attention back to the here and now.
Sometimes it can last for a whopping 37 minutes but other times, like today, I was content for the 8 minutes where my mind was ‘in the zone’.
When I took the pressure off for my meditation to be something it will never be, I exhaled in relief. Without pressure, I actually meditate more often.
I struggle making it into something it’s not for me: Sacred, Spiritual, Committed. Glamorous.
Instead, I give myself permission to let it be what it is: Simplistic. Random. Intuitive.
This means I will start meditating when it feels right to do so. Like today: sitting on the deck on a pillow, leaning against a shelf of herbs and gardening tools. I felt drawn to set social media aside and go inward.
No sacred place in my home.
No deity statue in front of me.
No relaxing music in the background.
No set time of the day.
No proper sitting position.
No mudras for my finger tips.
No laser-sharp focus on my in breath nor out breath.
No specific rules of what I should be or not be focusing on at all.
I lean back, close my eyes, and simply say the words “Be Here” in my mind.
This is my reminder to shift from being the thinker, to the place of observation of my brain thinking. (If you’ve read the Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, then this will be familiar to you).
“Be Here” means to be content in this very moment, feeling with complete certainty that everything is absolutely okay in that sliver of a moment. It’s surrendering all my worries, my to-dos, my fears, my dreams and desires and simply be at peace that ‘this moment’ is enough. It is beautiful. I am alive. I am healthy enough in this moment that I don’t need medical attention. I don’t even need food or water right now. I am nourished. I am loved. I am beautiful. I am enough. I am connected by heart and soul to my Grace above. I am fine. I am okay. Everything is okay. Right here. Right now. In this moment.
This is my meditative practice, in a nut shell.
It is pulling myself into the very moment I am experiencing.
Sometimes my breath will catch my attention, but not always.
Sometimes my mind is completely blank, for a few minutes, then it starts wandering again. I lovingly catch it and repeat “Be Here”.
Sometimes my brain is so active it needs an affirmation or mantra to repeat. So I do that instead.
Sometimes I need to listen to someone else guiding me through the meditation. Like Davidji.
Sometimes I simply listen to the sounds around me, or zone in on the sensation of the elements gracing my skin.
Sometimes I fall asleep.
As you can see, my meditation practice is not spiritually glamorous in any way. It happens as it happens and that is enough for me.
So consider this your permission slip to let your meditation be whatever you want it to be. Figure out what works best for you at this time in your life. Perhaps sacred structure is key for you, or perhaps a more casual approach will suit your lifestyle better. I simply encourage you to pull up your socks and just dive in. (Cameo long johns are optional)
Go inward. It’s a beautiful place in there. I promise.